On Fathers and Spirituality

Tags

fathers, Fathers Day, inheritance, legacy, spirituality

I would like to believe that spirituality is gender neutral. If our spirit – that which is beyond mind and body, beyond the influence of space and time, is gender-neutral, then so is perhaps our ‘spiritual path’ that connects us to It.

This is not to say that we live in a gender-neutral physical world. Our very physical inception as humans required the union of two different genders. For some of us, the propagation of our genetic inheritance leads us to one day inherit society’s label of ‘father’ or ‘mother’. In my case, unprepared as (I thought) I was, on that day when she was born, I said – now what?

Many a ‘Fathers Day’ has passed since that day. In times of totally being at sea as a Dad, I have often searched for calm waters and warm breezes among the wisdom memories of my own fathers (birth Dad, my two uncles) and my grandfathers. I have walked, bhikshu bowl in hand, for morsels of advice at the doorsteps of my peers and friends who have walked the path ahead of me. I have asked for many a blessing, invoked many a fervent prayer, in many a house of worship. I have sung many a song to evoke grace and received many a poem in trail, on many a trail of mother nature’s infinitude.

In the process of doing ‘fatherhood’, I have unfolded a ‘becoming a father’. It has slowly dawned on me that the greatest legacy of my ‘fathers’ was their dedication and devotion to their practice. They did not shy away from prayer, from honoring the divine, from practicing their faith, from singing the songs of their mothers and fathers. They subscribed to the practice of silence and stillness as a love-form, speaking soft yet weighty words with lovingly measured tones, and looking me in the eye with tenderness when they deemed that I was in veering towards being lost at sea.

As I reflected on the spirituality of my fathers this week, I realized that I have much to learn and practice. I have discovered that I am fortunate to have a wisdom treasury to draw upon when needed – for they all conspired, in their own way, by their own spiritual walk, to connect me to the treasury of the Infinite.

Kumud

P.S. This is not an eulogy to my fathers, or fatherhood in general. I realize that your experience(s) as fathers, with your father(s) and those that played such role(s) in your lives, may be far from, or totally opposite of what I have described. No matter your experience(s), I hope that you will choose to reflect a bit, and join us Sunday June 16 at 9amET in our weekly twitter chat in #SpiritChat – Namaste. Kumud.

On Mothers and Struggles

Tags

celebration, healing, mothers, mothersday, spirituality

Towards the end of my daughter’s middle-school’s performance of the Lion King, Simba (the heir apparent to his deceased father’s throne) is asked the question by his Mother: “Are you responsible for your father’s death? Did you murder him?”

Simba struggles to answer, as he was indeed present when his father was killed in an “accident” as a result of a plot hatched by his father’s brother. Simba, who was a young child at the time, has just returned from years in self-imposed exile, because he felt guilty about causing his father’s death.

I did not pay attention to Simba’s answer (because I already knew that he was innocent). However, what caught my awareness was the angst that his Mother must have felt when even asking that question of her son whom she hadn’t seen in many years. It is difficult to imagine the struggle of a mother grieving the loss of her husband (who was dead) and her son (who was presumed dead), now wondering if the son killed his father…

The very word “Mother” evokes strong emotions in many of us – whether we are in that role ourselves, or whether we have relationships with those in that role. No matter our response to that word, it can rarely be denied that the struggles of Mothers have always been, and continue to be real. As children, we often tend to be unaware of their struggles, the juggling acts of the many roles performed by our Mothers (or those who played those roles in our lives).

Over the past few years, I have often asked some questions about the potential challenges that my many Mothers may have faced in their lives. What were their dreams when they were in middle-school? What kind of encouragement (or lack of it) did they face when they shared their dreams with their parents? Were they treated fairly at home and at school and after their marriage? What became of their aspirations and what are the real stories of their lives? How has technology changed the struggles of today’s mothers and children? How do the dreams and struggles of our Mothers affect our (spiritual) identity?

The answers to many of these questions about my Mothers’ struggles are lost to time. Fragments of these questions were answered in my Mothers’ many past letters to me, and in the stories that my Mothers’ mothers told me about them. However, many of the answers are revealed in the very current struggles of those who are being Mothers to others, right in front of our eyes. The generations may be new, but, as it has been said – a Mother’s work (and struggle) is rarely finished.

Mother’s Day can be a call to raising awareness – to be empathetic to Mothers’ (and childrens’) struggles, to listen to their dreams and aspirations, to encourage them to tell their stories, and to give them time to celebrate their victories. Mother’s Day can also be a celebration to allow our Universal Mother to ask the toughest of questions of us, her beloved children – we can answer by sharing our struggles, our dreams, our aspirations, with her.

Namaste,

Kumud

P.S. Join us Sunday May 12 at 9amET / 630pm India for our weekly twitter chat. I will bring fresh brewed tea and flowers… you can bring some stories and recipes to share – Namaste. Kumud

Spring – when the trees spread their flowers in welcome to every passer-by…

The Spiritual Seekers

Tags

exploration, spiritual path, transformation

As I parked the car in a clearing on the parkway to begin my lunch hour walk on Friday, to coincide with the second upcoming meeting with some #spiritchat folks on Zoom, a question crossed my mind. What is it about the people who make the choice to (regularly) associate with others who are on the spiritual path – either in person, online, or through other mediums?

The first part of the answer started to emerge a few minutes later, as I joined the video meeting hosted by Christy (@IntuitiveHeal) and led by Lucille (@sageandsavvy) on the topic of “The book(s) that most influenced our lives”. Every person who chose to be present, shared their favorite book(s), why they were impactful to them, and how they influenced their life’s journey so far. The diversity of backgrounds, of experiences, of journeys was apparent from the diversity of books and authors that were shared by about a dozen folks.

The second part of the answer emerged later in the evening, as I attended a lecture by a visiting monk from the Vedanta center of Toronto. I observed as the room slowly filled up with people from all walks of life to listen to the topic of “Transformation of Personality”. Sitting in the front row on the floor, the spiritual force of the lecture, the energy of the speaker, seemed to wash over me again and again. There were revelations through the stories told by him, and even some tears.

After the event, while serving food, I struck up many short conversations with the some of the new faces at the event. I was particularly intrigued by a new person who said – “I want to know more about the volunteering opportunities that you mentioned during your emceeing at the podium”. I immediately thought to myself – here is a “seeker”. I talked to him at length, and found that we have families in the same town in India. New to this side of town, he came to the lecture because he saw a flyer at one of the Indian grocery stores. Random chance favors the seekers of the universe.

T

he events of a single Friday, one online and the other in person, had a common thread. Both events were energized by the willingness and the determination of the “seeker” who was seeking change. Both events were made possible by each individual seeker who acted upon their inner desire for change. And perhaps, that is what defines a “seeker” in all fields of life – they are the ones who are willing to open up to change, take action, and stay determined to stop not until the goal is achieved. The “seeker” is perhaps like the fish in the ocean who eats, breathes and sleeps the water of their spiritual journey.

Are you a seeker? If so, what are you seeking? What actions are you taking today to move closer to that which you are seeking? Who is guiding you, inspiring you, influencing you, keeping you company on your seeking journey?

Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. Join us Sunday, May 5th at 9am ET / 630pm India as we continue our seeker’s journey in our weekly #spiritchat conversation on twitter. I look forward to wandering, exploring and seeking with all of you. Namaste – Kumud.

The Seeker’s Playground…

On Seeding Friendships

Tags

celebration, creativity, energy, friendship, unity

At 5pm on Friday evening, a dozen or so folks gathered online in a multi-dimensional meeting which included sound, video, and much laughter. Lots of laughter. Many ideas were exchanged about how to best use such meetings in the future. But this first meeting was primarily about getting to know each other a bit better through the spoken word, through smiles and favorite quotes and prayers. It was about planting new seeds of friendship and growing the friendships that have formed through #SpiritChat over the years.

The Sanskrit word for ‘friendship’ is maitri. It is also referred to as <a href=”https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mettā“>Mettā</a> in the Pali language. How and where does a friendship first come to life? There is usually some common ground necessary for two (or more) people to decide to sit with one another. The sitting can be in silence, a primarily one-way communication (lecture), a two-way conversation, or even a multi-way exchange facilitated by a desire to be in each other’s presence.

When friendship takes on the energy of @maggiemistal, the expression of ‘loving kindness’ (@sageandsavvy), or is simply steeped in love (@AwakeningYourTrueSelf) or is a simple yet heart-felt expression of gratitude (@tomarciamae), it transmits the energy of the heart to all present. When it takes on the expression of ‘watching, waiting, working’ (thank you, @mscator), the gentle sharing by @wonderpix, the energy of @maggiemistal, the creativity of @heiddiz, it breathes new life into the sitting. When it is expressed through the Mettā prayer of @intuitiveheal, the wisdom of @southbaysome and the grace of @garygruber, one knows and feels that they are in a special space and time.

And so, the seeds of friendship are nurtured. One question, one answer, one chat, one conversation, one smile, one kind gesture, one zoom meeting at a time.

It is tough to say what will come next, but for today, the heart feels filled with maitri – the benevolence and radiance of those who shared with all of their heart.

The sage Patanjali said in his yoga sutras (aphorisms) – “be friendly towards those who are friendly towards you.” It sounds simple enough, but it isn’t always easy to do (why is that person being friendly? what do they want from me?) However, it is safe to say that we are largely “friendly to all” in the #SpiritChat community, and we extended on that principle in today’s sitting.

As I sat watching the radiant colors of the sun, the sky and the clouds merge into the lake waters, it reminded me of the ease with which we all converged on the common ground of friendship today. We came a bit closer to the essence of maitri, of Mettā, of meditation.

Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. What is (or was) the greatest friendship you have experienced? How were its seeds sown? How did its roots develop, its flowers bloom? And those friendships that withered away – what was their life cycle? Share with us, Sunday April 7 at 9amET / 1pm UTC / 630pm India in our weekly #spiritchat on Twitter. Namaste – Kumud

Why Spirituality – I Wonder

Tags

awakening, awareness, happiness, joy, spirituality, wonder

For those of us who have been in and around the weekly conversations with the #spiritchat community on topics related to spirituality and spiritual practice, the answer to “why spirituality” may be plain as daylight. Many of us may even think the question to be irrelevant, or take the answer for granted.

Yet, I have been wondering about this question over the past few days, with a sense of wonder, with a sense and spirit of inquisitive, curious, scientific examination.

So, let me share my sense of wonder with you, and ask the short question – “why spirituality”? What is it about your ‘spiritual practice(s)’ that sets them apart from the rest of your daily life? How do you integrate the results and outcomes of your spirituality into solving the challenges of life and living? Has your approach to ‘spirituality’ changed as your life situation(s) have changed? If yes, how so?

I have often found that the answer to the question, particularly the question that is borne of wonder instead of being borne out of doubt, is already present in our awareness. Over the past few weeks, in preparation for spring, I have been doing some ‘house cleaning’ of my books, media, music and notebooks. During one such episode this week, I came across a few books that were given to be by my mother over my past few visits to India.

As I was sorting through them, one of the ‘bookmarks’ that I came across was a trifold brochure called ‘why spirituality’! The brochure, published in 2011, contains a few quotes from the then leader (Chariji) of the ‘Sahaj Marg’ foundation (http://sahajmarg.org). It contained not one, but a few answers to my sense of wonder. Let me share some of them with you in the quotes below – maybe one or more of them will resonate with you.

“Spirituality is the need for an inner existence. The whole idea of spirituality is to revive in us that which is sleeping in us – the true inner being, the Self”

Why Spirituality? It is a path to an awakening within. It is a yearning for something more than the routine of daily, worldly life. In spirituality, life becomes a wondrous journey to uncover that inner Self. Wonder leads to a wondrous journey. Yes!

“As a bird needs two wings to fly, a human being needs the two wings of existence, the spiritual and the material, to lead a natural and harmonious life”

Why Spirituality? For harmony, for the restoration of balance. Balance is restored by integrating a spiritual practice into daily life. A practice that blends into our daily living like sugar dissolves into tea.

“Happiness is the natural inner condition that we will reach when we have removed all unnecessary things”

Why Spirituality? Spiritual practice leads us to find true happiness and love. Joy is the quality of the inner Self, and is nurtured in spirituality, along with other qualities of the heart – courage, hope, faith, wonder, compassion, tolerance and, most of all, universal love. By following a spiritual practice, we have the possibility to experience universal love, the divine essence, within our own heart.

The brochure holds more wondrous messages. I shared the thoughts above with you, so that perhaps, you too shall wonder with a sense of inquiry – why spirituality? What is this spiritual path that I walk in my practice? How does my spirituality grow my heart and its inherent qualities, and the sense of joy and love within it?

Let the wondering begin. Let us share our wonder, our heart, and our joy and universal love with each other. And I will keep cleaning, exploring, practicing, uncovering more wonder. Namaste.

Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. Join the #spiritchat community in our weekly twitter conversation – Sunday, Feb 10 at 9amET / 730pm India. Bring your sense of wonder with you, as we share the answers to ‘why spirituality’, over a cup of tea. Thank you!

After the storm, a double rainbow outside my door…

The Spirit of Loyalty

Tags

heart matters, loyalty, poetry, service, spirituality

“I am loyal to the throne. Who are you loyal to?”

It is interesting that we can watch a two-plus hour movie (during a polar vortex shut-in) filled with action, and the one fragment that adheres to us, days later. In the movie “Black Panther”, the question above was asked by Okoye (the General) of Nakia (the future Queen), in the moments after there is upheaval in the country of Wakanda.

I thought about the question that evening, and it kept returning to my brain box for a few days. I am still thinking about it. Let us begin at the beginning. What is loyalty? One definition of loyalty is a strong feeling of support of allegiance. The other synonyms are faithfulness, obedience, adherence, devotion and the like. It would seem that loyalty would be a good quality or virtue to develop in our character, yes?

Before we answer the original question (who are we loyal to?), maybe we can reflect on some related questions. Where does our sense of loyalty come from? What qualities in others incite, grow and sustain loyalty within us? What makes our loyalties wax and wane over time? Have you experienced real-world examples of long-term, unwavering, even permanent loyalty in your life? If so, how did such examples of loyalty influence you, your life?

Now that we have put the questions out upfront, we can reflect on them and probe for the answers. If we choose not to probe, we can cast the questions out like seeds, and wait for the answers to bloom in their own time. Either way, if we remain loyal to the process of asking, and then provide space and time for the answers to be received by us, the process has a chance of working. In this increasingly hurried world, we can perhaps reflect on the question – how loyal are we to the process of receiving (answers)?

But I digress a bit. As I asked myself some of the questions about loyalty, one common answer that seemed to emerge was that a lot of our loyalties, allegiances, adherences, even devotions – are transitional and transient in nature. Time and space and relationships change as we transit through life, and so do our loyalties. Even the long-term loyalties of satellites (moons) to planets are constantly changing (albeit ever so slightly) over time. (Aside: what examples of ‘deep loyalty’ may Mother Nature reveal to us?) So what chance do we mere mortals, of finite life-spans, have of developing and honoring permanent loyalty?

Maybe we need to look beyond, if we are to experience a permanent sense of loyalty. Our physical frames of existence and our actions within them, bound as they are by time, space and causation, are bound by impermanence. Hence, the resulting loyalties are (mostly) impermanent. What if we were to go beyond the physical, and into the spiritual domain? If we were to become and be meditative, examine our heartspace and feel our heartsense, what deeper loyalties may be revealed in That light?

Before she asked that question of Nakia, Okoye actually said… “I am loyal to the throne, no matter who sits on it“. If we ask the same question of our heart, what will be the reply? Who sits on our heart’s throne? Who are we really loyal to? Does that relationship have a nature of permanence?

Kumud @AjmaniK

On behalf of the #SpiritChat community, I invite you to join us for a conversation on this topic – Sunday, February 3 at 9amET / 730pm India. We would love to know – who sits on your heart’s throne? Namaste.

Postscript: Fragments of a poem, that keep coming, as answers to the question… if you can think of additions, please share in the comments… Namaste…

There may be be love without cause,
Just because…
But what is the nature, of cause without love?

There may be clouds without rain,
With loud refrain…
But what is the worth, of rain without clouds?

There may be heat without light,
Warming the night…
But have we felt the love, of light without heat?

There can be sight without vision,
A heart’s decision…
But can there be vision without sight?

– A Traveler’s Loyalty

Our Spiritual Ancestry

Tags

ancestry, inheritance, remembrance, spirituality

The two week period between the full moon in September and the next new moon (October 9) are observed as Mahalaya (the great wave or rhythm) – the fortnight which honors the gifts of our ancestors and our ancestry at large. I was scarcely aware of my ancestors until my father passed away and I spent some time traveling to the Ganges for the visarjan – the final letting-go of the physical remains.

The current family priest, whose generation was the holder of our family records, unrolled the biggest handwritten book I had ever seen, full of double-sized legal sheets of paper with names of our antecedents – records that must have gone back tens of generations. It was a humbling awareness, to realize that my name would become a part of that record some day.

Beyond our physical ancestry, whose records are often susceptible to be lost to our awareness, there is our spiritual ancestry. Like the DNA that is given to us, the record of our spiritual ancestry is less susceptible to be lost over time. In Indian culture, spiritual inheritance comes in two forms – smriti (oral word) and shruti (written word). Both forms have their significance, but the former is less susceptible to being lost (or destroyed) as it is preserved in the heart’s and minds of families of the preservers.

In honoring our spiritual ancestry, the first step is to remember that we actually do have one. The books, the music, the art, the festivals, the traditions, are all the physical manifestations of our spiritual ancestry. But, it goes beyond that. The greater manifestation is the pull towards self-realization through spiritual practice. Whether it be through the path of selfless, loving action, through deep inner contemplation (yoga), through deep devotion evolving through purity, or through seeking of knowledge – all the paths eventually honor our spiritual ancestry when we walk them with a spirit of open-heartedness and joy.

On the final day of the fortnight of Mahalaya, the day before the new moon, a simple offering of water (tarpan) is made to honor all our ancestors. In making an offering of water, we honor life itself. We honor our spiritual ancestry by re-aligning our heartbeat with the great rhythm – the very rhythm that we feel in the silence and the stillness of sitting on the great ocean-shore of love.

Kumud @AjmaniK

What is your spiritual ancestry? Are you aware of it? How does it influence your daily life, and the lives of those who connect with you? Share with us in our weekly twitter chat, Sunday Oct 8 at 9amET / 630pm India in #SpiritChat. Namaste.

Spiritual Ancestry through shruti

Spiritual Ancestry serves as a bridge…

Challenging Traditions

Tags

challenges, heritage, legacy, letting go, traditions

As one holiday season comes to a close (my inherited Indian traditions) and another one draws nearer (my adoptedm American traditions), I find myself in a somewhat unique positon to compare and contrast the two. At every major Indian festival, I am reminded of some of the traditions of my parents, grandparents, friends and extended family that I grew up with before I moved to the USA. I do have to admit that their color fades ever so imperceptibly over the years.

Over the three decades that I have lived in the USA, I have created a few (holiday) traditions (of my own), to blend with the ones that I inherited. I do have to admit that it is a lot of work to create new, sustainable and meaningful traditions. Only time will tell how these newly created traditions will stand up to the test of our increasingly mobile and fluid landscape of friendships and relationships.

Traditions need not be exclusively associated with holidays, festivals and celebrations. As I evaluate the traditions that have stuck with me the longest, a few salient qualities come to the fore. The ones that have stood the test of space and time are those that promote simplicity, purity, cleanliness and respect in action. I observe them not for tradition’s sake, but because they make a meaningful, positive impact on the quality of my everyday life.

The tradition of silence with which my grandparents went about their daily business, without any fuss or complaint, inspires me to do the same. The reverence that my mother held for cleanliness in all her actions was often the subject of friendly banter – nobody could drink from her mug of tea, use her pillow or blanket, bring shoes into her kitchen, or… you get the idea – and yet it became a tradition in purity that many of us now observe with a smile. Have you inherited any ‘quirks’ of your parents and grandparents that have now become ‘traditions’ for you?

Perhaps the greatest value of traditions is in their ability to lend some measure of consistency and stability to our life-systems. As we face new, and often unforeseen, challenges, we can lean on our traditions for support. At the same time, it is prudent for us to ask questions of, to challenge those traditions that may be past their ‘use-by’ date in our life. How is any meaningful social, economic and spiritual change going to be effected if we calcify our hearts in the name of ‘tradition’?

Hence, the notion of ‘challenging traditions’. They create some challenges. The need/want to pass on and share as many of our inherited traditions. The need/want to let go, with love, of the ones that create more problems than they solve. The need/want to create some new ones with our new neighbors, friends and family. Can you think of any more challenges associated with ‘traditions’?

In closing, I invite you to share your thoughts on ‘challenging traditions’ with us in #SpiritChat on twitter – Sunday, November 12th at 9amET/2pmUTC/730pmIST. We will continue our ‘tradition’ of conversation over tea and cookies in the virtual world. Namaste,

Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. As I write this, it is a beautiful Saturday afternoon in November. November 11th, to be exact. Armistice Day. Remembrance Day. Veterans Day. A day that marks a traditional, solemn observance of respect and gratitude for those who have fought and served to preserve, promote and promulgate the freedom(s) of many. This is one tradition that is surely worth keeping. Thank you, Veterans!

My walks in the forest are developing into a newly created ‘morning’ tradition for me…

Spiritual Origins – Where am I from?

Tags

ancestry, legacy, origins

Their first assignment in social-studies and language-arts class this school year was to write a poem titled “I’m From…”. The purpose was to examine their own identity and culture, and perhaps make them aware of their unique place in the world. On reading her beautiful poem, I was so inspired that I asked myself the same question – where am I from?

I share with you the result, which is a work in progress.. and I invite you to ask the same question – and maybe even write a similar poem and share a bit of your story of origin with us.

—

I am from Shiva and Shakti…
From temple bells ringing through the night in celebration
And walking barefoot up mountain trails to pay homage to Devi.

I am from Vijay of Rawalpindi and Ruma of Lahore…
From flying over the himalayas in transport planes to plateaus of Ladakh in summers
And three-day long train trips across the Gangetic plains and Assam to Arunachal in winters.

I am from so many brothers and sisters…
From envelopes stuffed with threads of love traveling across continents.
And crying tears in farewell and welcoming at airport terminals across the world.

I am from the friendship of the five…
From the four Ks and the one M that represent fire, water, earth, wind and space
And the bond that transcends space and time to connect us three decades hence.

I am from the One who has taught me to love…
From She who knows beyond knowing the meaning of giving
And the Cecilia who taught me how to celebrate the beaches and Cataratas.

I am from Westlake and Haridwar…
From the joy in hospital rooms where Joia emerged with light
And immersions in rivers where loved ones were released to their final journey.

I am from the song eternal sung in the Bhagavad Gita…
From Vivekananda and the call to “Arise, Awake and Stop Not!” in Kanyakumari
And the heart-filling presence of Joy in stillness created daily by the Masters.

I am from That. And That is my Truth.

—-

What are your origin(s)? Where are You From?

– Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. Join us Sunday, Septemeber 3rd at 9amET/1pmUTC for our weekly chat on twitter in #SpiritChat. We will ask some questions about our (spiritual) origin(s) – where are we from? what is the truth of our existence? what makes us ‘work’? what makes us cry and laugh? Namaste.