Ingredients for Happiness

Tags

connection, fun, happiness, joy, purpose, satisfaction, volunteering

Every single muscle in my body seemed to be hurting. In addition, I was made aware of muscles that I didn’t even know I had. That’s what the better part of a day spent hauling mulch and power-washing does to a body used to sitting in front of a computer most days.

And yet, I was brimming with a feeling of happiness. Why? I had just spent an entire, beautiful autumn day working the annual ‘Day of Service’ at my daughter’s school. I wasn’t happy simply because i had spent the day volunteering. It was a combination of a few key ingredients.

According to Arthur Brooks in ‘how to build a life’, most people experience happiness when three ingredients come together. The first ingredient is Fun! Was volunteering fun for me? Absolutely! The entire school, including students, faculty and staff was out and about doing various service projects. It was fun watching them in action, and it was even more fun working alongside my wife as we got covered in dirt and grime and water fairly quickly. And who doesn’t have fun with power tools that make work easy?

Do you remember the last time you had Fun? When was it, and what were you doing?

The second ingredient is Satisfaction. Is volunteering satisfactory? Absolutely yes! After a full week of not-so-satisfying intellectual gymnastics at ‘work’, a day of manual labor was immensely satisfying. It was a sort of ‘deep cleansing’ that the brainbox appreciated greatly by the middle of the day. By the end of the day, my brain was so deeply flushed that I had forgotten how to spell my name. Not really, but you get the idea. I was thoroughly satisfied with the results of the work done, even though I knew that it would have to be done again in a year. The satisfying feeling would pass, like water through a colander, and yet, it felt good to experience it in the moment. It was like a cup of good tea!

When was the last time you felt deeply satisfied? What brought on the feeling?

The third ingredient for happiness is Purpose. We often ask the big questions like what is our life’s purpose, why are we here and so on. These are good questions to ask because they give us a framework with which to align our actions. I hadn’t imagined that a day of manual labor would feed my sense of purpose, but the fact that there were so many other folks on campus working together towards a common goal, made it so. At the end of the day, it surely felt like I had done something meaningful and purposeful. The years of black grime on the concrete walls of the auditorium had been forever banished!

The combination of the three ingredients of fun, satisfaction and purpose created happiness. I think there was a fourth ingredient that was the cherry on the happiness cake – connection. I got to see and chat with so many teachers from previous grades, staff I hadn’t seen in a while due to the pandemic, and more. I heard wedding stories, birth and death stories, college graduation stories, and much more. It all felt good and my heart was smiling by the end of the day.

I didn’t go to seek happiness today at the ‘Day of Service’. It went thinking I would ‘serve’ in the hours before lunch and then ‘work work’ after lunch. I ended up staying the whole day because I could feel my happiness tank getting filled, even as my physical tank was getting drained. The result? One of the happiest days of the week.

I encourage you to reflect on your happiness creators. When is the last time you were having fun, feeling satisfied, doing something purposeful and creating connections, all at the same time? Was that when you felt you were face-to-face with happiness? Or are there other, different ingredients that create happiness for you?

Kumud

P. S. Join us for our weekly community gathering, Sunday Sep 26 at 9amET / 630pm India in #spiritchat on Twitter. Share your keys to happiness with us. Namaste ~ @AjmaniK

Autumn Mums changing color… spreading happiness

On Service and Healing

Tags

healing, purity, purpose, remembrance, service, walking

By the time I completed my one or so hour’s weekly Friday morning walk on the trail, the landscape had changed considerably. The sun had risen higher in the sky above the trees, the shadows were shorter, the trail was brighter.

Let me go back to the start of the walk. A flock of migrating geese had laid claim to part of the trail’s entrance, which made me navigate a longer path than usual. Fair enough. They were there first, and they needed to feast on the grass more than I needed to walk on it! They did yield a bit of ground when they saw me, but I could sense from some honking that they were none too happy about it.

A few minutes into circling the pond, I saw a blue heron fly over with silent, effortless grace. It must have seen me coming, and as usual, wanted nothing to do with any human this early in the morning. A short while later, I managed to stir a gaggle of mallard ducks off of the pond. I was now three of three in managing to disturb three different sets of birds in a span of a few minutes. I surely wasn’t serving or healing them in any way today!

And yet, I felt my engagement with them, wordless as it was, serving me on this day as I processed some of my memories and emotions from twenty years ago. The highest example of service set by the first responders, fire fighters, police, medical personnel and thousands of others on that day is part of American history. Never to be forgotten. They served because they were compelled to answer the calls, and many paid with their lives for it. A lot of them, their families and friends, are still suffering, processing their grief and healing from that day.

As I continue my walk, I feel a sense of gratitude sweep over me for the fact that I was a witness to their acts of service. A sense of healing followed from the awareness that every one who served someone on that day became part of that history. The good karma of their service, and the healing that it effected, is forever embedded in their hearts and the hearts of those they served. Such is the nature of all acts of kindness, of goodness, of service to others — they all purify the server’s heart in ways big and small. Healing follows for the server and the recipient.

And so, I continue to walk the path because I have been inspired by so many who have oriented my heart towards an awareness to serve, to heal, and be healed in the process. I may not be able to serve everyone that I may come across – and just like the three sets of birds, I may even annoy them, but never mind that. I know that opportunities to serve will keep unfolding. I know that if I keep waking, walking and seeking, then it shall be given.

The Bhagavad Gita and many other scriptures say — Purify the heart through service or Seva and all the treasuries of truth, awareness and bliss shall be opened to you. That’s my inspiration to serve. I hope you find yours.

Kumud

P.S. Join in for our weekly virtual walk and Twitter gathering in #SpiritChat – Sunday September 12 at 9am ET / 630pm India. We will serve tea and cookies, and heal together. Namaste – @AjmaniK

Serving and healing the community by planting new flowers…

The Art of Doing Nothing

Tags

consciousness, meditation, nothingness, purpose, relaxation

One annual rite of passage at the start of summer is the making of the ‘reading list’. At my daughter’s school, the ‘requirement’ is to read a few thousand words worth of books from a list of their own making. As her first week out of school came to a close on Friday, she decided that we ought to give the library a visit so that she could get started.

The library, after over a year or so? Well, yes! Paper books. Yay! And I would have plenty of time to browse the “New Books” section because her list was a dozen and a half books long. Maybe I would find a new title on poetry or spirituality. We would see…

Thirty minutes of browsing, pulling and putting books back, and nothing was ‘speaking’ to me. And then, a small hardcover in white that said, “NIKSEN – Embracing the Dutch Art of Doing Nothing”. This was it. How did the library know that I had been exploring the Zen practice of “Wu Wei” or “purposelessness” over the past week or so?!

Needless to say, “Niksen” came home with me and I have been enjoying it. At first glance, the phrase “doing nothing” seems like an oxymoron because it combines ‘doing’ with ‘nothing’. If we are ‘doing’, then it cannot be ‘nothing’, right? The paradox can be resolved by adding ‘without premeditation or defined purpose’ to the ‘doing’. Think of an unplanned, spontaneous detour on a road trip. Or a trip into la-la land as you pause your brisk morning walk to look at the geese and new goslings cross the street. Or…

In moments where we suspend the churn of mental, emotional and even spiritual activity, we can find ourselves in a state of ‘doing nothing’. It is a state of just being. Some would equate ‘doing nothing’ to ‘being useless’. Even if that were true, the Tao philosophy posits that it is the balance between the ‘useless’ and the ‘useful’ that gives meaning to life. The pursuit of ‘being useful’ accumulates stress and tension in our lives. Embracing the useless by doing nothing, even for a few moments, can release stress and renew us.

We have all experienced those moments where we ‘lost ourselves’ to the world as we immersed into nothingness. Gazing at a butterfly landing on the azaleas, watching the kids rolling down the hill at the playground, listening to a favorite piece of music or dozing off in a lounge chair during a beach trip. You get the idea. Doing nothing can be so much fun because it feels like play! So, why don’t we do more of Niksen or Wu-wei?

We have our reasons, real and imagined. We have responsibilities, deadlines, project reports, home-stuff, school-stuff, work-stuff, the stuff of life and death. How are we supposed to find time for conscious nothingness in our busy lives? Maybe we can ask a different question. Where are we headed if we don’t make time to ‘do nothing’ and give the ‘useful’ moments of our life a chance to rest?

Let’s make time. If necessary, schedule time to do nothing. It’s going to be uncomfortable for some of us ‘go getters’. If it helps, let’s consider your ‘doing nothing’ time as a new growth opportunity. Who knows? We may find ourselves niksening in the “what’s new” section of our local library and even discover some new (inner) treasures.

Kumud

P.S. I invite you to join our weekly Twitter chat on Sunday June 6 at 9amET / 630pm India. We will play with the idea of doing nothing in #Spiritchat! Namaste – @AjmaniK

Sunrise happens while we do nothing…

In Loving Remembrance

Tags

love, memorial day, purpose, remembrance, yoga

The act of remembrance is a multifaceted thing. Some practice it in deep silence while others may engage it with sound and fury of music and focalization. Some may pick up a brush, dip it in colors and paint their memories into masterpieces, while others may dance their way across wooden floors in the company of new friends.

Regardless of personal preference, the practice is important because it reminds us of the frailty and fragility of our own life. Remembrance and memorialization have been with us as integral parts of our lives for as long as human memory exists. Thousands of years ago, the Egyptians built great pyramids. Why? So that they could be remembered, not forgotten.

This fear that we shall somehow be forgotten in death is perhaps what drives us to seek a purpose-filled life, a life where we ‘make a difference in the world’ and even ‘leave it a better place’. What could we perhaps do in this life that would make us immemorial? We could begin by remembering why we’re here in the first place.

One simple explanation of this ‘why’ is that we are here to remember love. Not just ordinary, human love, but to partake in the experience of divine love. In the Yoga tradition, this experience can be felt through Bhakti – a deep, constant, immersive remembrance of the beloved in the divine. And yet, this is only one way to love.

The Yoga of action, or Karma Yoga, also leads us to divine love. We simply have to remember to dedicate all our actions to the real doer, the divine. The Yogas of knowledge (Gyana) and meditation (Raja), both have pathways to lead us to the remembrance of the presence of divine love in our lives.

Our greatest spiritual challenge is that of forgetfulness. We forget that the opportunity to experience divine love is available to us in every given moment. Yes, love requires labor. But what if we were to remember to integrate deep immersion, inspired action, experiential knowledge and in-the-moment meditation into our labor of loving?

With loving remembrance, we can develop awareness of oneness, and our lives can become living memorials of truth and joy to all those whose silent sacrifices of life-force have fired our hearts with higher purpose. Let our gratitude flow towards them today.

Namaste,

Kumud

Join us for our weekly Twitter chat, Memorial Sunday (in the USA), May 30 at 9amET / 630pm India in #SpiritChat, as we discuss remembrance and love. Namaste ~ @AjmaniK

The Heart’s Purpose

Tags

fulfillment, heart matters, heartmonth, purpose, significance

Sometimes, you can live a lot of life in a mere five minutes. Sometimes, it may take you five hours, five days, or even five years to life a lot of life. Sometimes, even fifty years may not seem to be enough to live the life that we feel we ought to have lived or hope to live.

Before we go further, let me ask a question. What is the most significant ‘thing’ that you can remember about the last five years of your life? Some will ask in return – well, what do you mean by significant? One way to answer the ‘what is significant’ question is to ask – how well did it align with my purpose? To go further down the rabbit hole, we then ask, what is my (heart’s) purpose?

Purpose can be a very wide-ranging thing. Some of us (ahem) tend to spend a lot of time – a bit more than five minutes – wondering about purpose. Does my purpose need to be something I love (to do)? Does purpose need to align with what the world needs? Does purpose have to focus on what I can make money with? Or can purpose be drawn from my natural talents and what I am good at? 

The four questions related to refining and defining of purpose, so that we can arrive at significance, and what the Japanese have called  Ikigai – a reason for being. 

Ikigai entails actions of devoting oneself to pursuits one enjoys and is associated with feelings of accomplishment and fulfillment – Michigo Kumano

I was pointed to this perspective on purpose by my very good friend, Gopi Maliwal, following a discussion four weeks ago after he had cryptically (and uncharacteristically :)) tweeted… “this is one of the happiest days of my life”. We talked more via DM, and the reason for his “happiest day” became abundantly clear to me. He shared that he felt a sense of fulfillment because he had taken a step “to make his life truly useful”.

The brief conversation made me ask the question – what would give my heart and its actions a sense of accomplishment, of fulfillment, of significance, of having fulfilled its purpose? I further asked – five minutes, five days or five years hence, how much of my living will contribute to bringing me closer to my heart’s purpose?

I invite you to ask some of these questions. If it helps, sit with a loved one in your heartspace and reflect on the four quadrants – what are  you really good at, what is your current work, what does the world need, and, what do you love? What is it that lies at the intersection of the four quadrants? What emerges from the intersection?

Kumud

P.S. Heartmonth continues in our weekly conversation on twitter – Sunday, Feb 14 at 9amET / 730pm India. Join us as we explore our heart’s purpose and share the love. Namaste – @AjmaniK

The heart’s purpose is often revealed by Nature…

On Dreams and Dreamers

Tags

dreams, freedom, purpose, spirituality

For a long time, for what seemed like months, as my morning meditation practice grew, the dreams had stopped coming while I was asleep at night. I have always been a good sleeper, but these dreamless sleeps had taken it to a greater depth of dreamless sleeping. I would awaken greatly refreshed, ready to go upstairs and begin my day with meditation, and so on.

But then, over the last week or two or so, as is the wont of change that often comes suddenly, the ‘dreaming while sleeping’ returned. The seemingly ‘on-the-surface’ yet ‘active’ dreams took me on journeys with long-out-of-touch friends and long-departed family members. How ‘real’ they seemed while I was “in” them, and how quickly they disappeared on the first early-morning awakening out of broken sleep! And as is also often their wont, the more I tried to remember them, the more they slipped through my awareness like water flowing through fingers. And the net result was that I awoke tired, even lethargic.

Lethargy is not this seeker’s friend. Or of the wanderer. Of of the explorer. Or even the sitter. So, being the engineer and analyst that I am, the one whose propensity is to ask “why”, I asked – why did they return? Was it because of my increased work-related tasks, my staying up later and later before bed, the usual uptick in reading during summer, or the general cluttering of the brain? Regardless, I would like to return to my dreamless state, so I can wake up to my previous, non-lethargic, jump-out-of-bed and ready-to-go state?

But, I digress a bit (as is my wont). From a spiritual perspective, our ‘dream state’ goes beyond the surface dreams that occasionally may come. We are immersed in the deep, deep ocean of this great dream that you, the reader, is somehow fundamentally different than me, the writer. And hence, we live most of our physical life immersed in the ocean, like fish in deep water, whose awareness knows only water, and more so, its immediate waters. We may even claim ‘privilege’ of prosperity, of wealth, of knowledge, of (yes) spirituality, over those, some of whom we may even call family, friends and neighbors. We are unaware, or have lost awareness that our differences, our dreams, depend simply on our degrees of manifestation. Is this not simply a deeper dream state that we can perhaps awaken from?

Perhaps this awakening to reality is the purpose of the work of our spiritual practices.

For what is ‘reality’? Is it not the awareness that we ALL are “Infinite, Absolute, Eternal, Knowledge, Existence, Bliss”? If this reality is our truth, then perhaps we can let go of our current dream-state of illusions and delusions. If not, then immersed we shall remain, until, perhaps, grace finds us, ready to return us to a dreamless state.

For no matter how sweet my dreams may be, I feel an awareness, a knowing, that walking in an awakened reality is going to be sweeter than the sweetest of dreams.

Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. This post was heavily inspired by my stumbling upon the essay, “Vedanta and Privilege” by Swami Vivekananda. Do read if you have a chance. And then join us for #SpiritChat on Twitter – Sunday August 5 at 9amET/ 630pmET. Namaste. – Kumud

What is the the flower’s dream? What is its reality?

On Spiritual Investment

Tags

investment, passion, purpose, spirtuality

What do we tend to invest in? The investment advisors, and there are many of them with perhaps as many different opinions as there are investment opportunities, often ask us to first evaluate our ‘risk profile’. The questions are in the form of a short quiz that asks questions like – “what are your long term and short term goals for investing”, or “what would you do if your investment lost 20% of its value in a month”, and more.

Our answers are then analyzed by the advisor, who then recommends how to make allocations in our investment portfolio. Invest this much in stocks, this much in bonds, and so on. But investing is rarely a ‘set it and forget it’ proposition. We are also advised to keep revisiting our ‘risk profile’ as your life goes through changes, and rebalance our investment portfolio regularly.

So, how do we use this model in our spiritual investments – the time, energy and actions that are available for us to invest towards our spiritual progress? Are we ‘rolling our own’ when it comes to our investment strategy towards our spiritual goals? Or do we have a trusted advisor to guide us? Do we take time to evaluate our spiritual investments when the state of our life suddenly changes? How often do we reevaluate and rebalance our spiritual practice?

I asked all of the above questions, and a few more, two years ago, when my Mother passed away suddenly. There is rarely anything that brings a greater sense of urgency, that the “time is now”, than the loss of a loved one. It brought a new perspective to my spiritual practice. It made me evaluate the ‘risk profile’ of my current spiritual practice(s), and led me to rebalance my time investments in my practices of writing, being in nature, building community, and daily meditation.

Two years to the day and virtually the hour of her passing, I found myself reevaluating my spiritual investments yet again. I found myself sitting across the table, listening to Mitch Albom, of “Tuesdays with Morrie” fame. I had volunteered to drive my (cousin) sister to inner city Detroit, to speak with him about a social investment fund that she is planning to get off the ground. Mitch’s intense passion for making change in one of the poorest cities in America poured out in every word that he spoke. His investment of time, energy, leadership and acknowledgement that his organizations face a huge uphill battle, was apparent during the conversation.

At the end of the meeting, on the drive home, I could not help but ask the question. What am I investing in? What impact is it having in my life, and the life of others? Are the investment returns designed for short and long term returns? Or is it time to rebalance my ‘spiritual action’ portfolio?

I only have questions so far, but I do know that the heart will bring me the answers. I also know this for sure – that the “time is now”, to ask again – what is it that I am investing in with ALL my heart?

Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. I invite you to join us to discuss ‘Spiritual Investments’ – Sunday, February 18th 2018 at 9amET/2pmUTC on twitter. Namaste, and thank you, for your investment in the #SpiritChat community -Kumud

On Passion and Peace

Tags

passion, peace, practice, purpose

What is my foremost passion in life right now?

Some of us can instantly answer that question. Others may need some reflection to arrive at an answer. Regardless of which category you may find yourself in, it may be useful to try and define the word…

passion: a strong or barely controlled emotion… a state or outburst of strong emotion

The thesaurus suggests some synonyms as fervor, ardor, enthusiasm, fieriness, zeal, spiritedness and fanaticism. It seems clear that our passion, whatever it may be, has the ability to connect us to a relatively high state of energy, action, and emotion. Passion also has the ability to bring us to the edge of, the tipping point of energetic balance in our lives, and leave us there. It can almost seem like the edge of a precipice on our journey.

Whether we go towards higher plateaus in life or fall off the precipice, perhaps depends on our ability to remain focused on our purpose. We have a choice. We can use the energy of our passion to lead us towards the higher ground of compassion. Or we can let the strong emotion of unbridled passion lead us towards anger. We are all familiar with what compassion can produce. So, let us examine what anger creates…

Anger creates a state that steals our Joy. It is like the autumn wind that makes the garden barren. When Joy leaves, we lose perspective. We tend to find ourselves in inner turmoil, as we find that peace is departing too. Anger fueled by frustration, lack of control, leads the passion train. Joy and Peace follow the anger engine. And before we know it, our entire inner emotional train has derailed. The casualties are many.

So, how do we position ourselves so that, at the edge of the emotional passion precipice, we can move towards compassion instead of anger? I believe that it is through practice. With observation comes learning. Repeated and regular observation of our passion(s) and their propensity can become our personal practice. With practice, we can learn how to turn the energy of passion — away from the feelings of unfulfillment, undeservedness, unlovedness, and their likes.

In that great turning away from the precipice, we can then use passion to walk our path of purpose, upwards towards the summit, with joy in every step. And before we know it, the nature’s justice will have returned our gardens and valleys to spring-like bloom. Passion would have then produced three things worthy of celebration – Peace. Peace. Peace.

Namaste,

Kumud @AjmaniK

P.S. What’s your take on passion and peace? Share with us in the comments below. We also invite you to join our weekly twitter chat on Sunday, December 10th at 9amET/730pmIST in #SpiritChat ~ Do join us!

Walking the Cuyahoga Valley – a celebrated passion of mine…

Our Personal Spiritual Mission

Tags

goals, mission, purpose, spiritchat, spirituality

What is my personal spiritual mission?

From time to time, this question returns to me, albeit it may appear in different forms. The word “mission” may be replaced with the word “purpose” or “goal”, or the broader phrase – “why am I here”? This seemingly existential question may indicate a discontentment with the current state of our lives, or it may be part of a periodic evaluation that some of us do to take stock of where exactly we are on our life journey. If the question arises from “a divine discontentment”, it may a manifestation of the motive energy that we need to move forward on our path. If it arises during a process of “self-evaluation”, it may be a sign that we are growing in mindful awareness, and want to make optimal use of the spiritual energy available to us.

Regardless of the origin of the question, the answer may not come easily for most of us. Some of us, who believe in the power of “the calling”, may have decided to be patient and wait for the answer. Some of us, who believe in the power of “the journey is the calling”, may have decided that every step forward brings us closer to the answer. Some of us, may believe that it isn’t even necessary to have the answer, and that the definition of a “spiritual mission” is unnecessary – living “in the moment” is enough – for a “mission” indicates a sense of being bound by space and time, and true spirituality means freedom from space and time.

For the “goal oriented” among us, the actions of “goal setting”, to achieve our purpose, to fulfill our “mission”, can give us a sense of comfort. The “comfort” comes from the self-discipline in thought, speech and action that we know we have to bring into play, if we are to work towards our goals. The “rules of the game” are clear, and the personal and universal “truths” that define our mission are clearer still. These clarities lead to synergy of action between man and nature, making optimal use of our powers of intellect and creativity, to clear our path to spiritual “success”. We learn to control our energy, our mind and senses, we learn to concentrate, and perhaps even meditate, which further helps us to achieve our purpose, our mission.

But what if one is not exactly “goal oriented” or “mission driven”? What is to become of their spiritual growth, their life-purpose? What if one does not have, or has not been able to clarify their “spiritual mission”? What is the path of action for them? Are they to simply resign themselves to being under-achievers in their spiritual journey? Is a “personal spiritual mission” absolutely neceesary to be a spiritual “high achiever”? Or is there an alternate, non goal-oriented, non mission-driven, spiritual journey that is full of truth, joy and enlightment possible for them?

If you have a clear, personal spiritual mission that is guidiing your journey, and you would like to share it with us, please join us Sunday, March 22nd 2015 at 9amET on twitter in #SpiritChat. If you are in the process of clarifying your mission, or you believe that you don’t really even need one, we also want to hear your thoughts. We welcome all of you to join the community, so we can all learn and grow together.

Thank you, and Namaste!

Kumud

On Remembering and Purpose

Tags

humanity, purpose, spiritchat, spirituality

Wendy Wolff of @lettersproject will be our special guest in #SpiritChat Sunday November 9th at 9amET/2pmUTC on twitter. Please join us and learn from her life-experience, as she shares on “Remembering and Purpose”. Please do check out her Letter Writing Project book on amazon and her website. Here are a few thoughts by Wendy on this topic. Thank you, Wendy!

Remembering WHO you are vs. figuring it out WHO you are. As we navigate humanity, freedom can be found when we recall our purpose for being here. There is exuberance and elation that follows. Always joy and relief accompany what our role is in this complicated world. Sometimes it takes years of counseling and coaching to find that space. Other times it merely takes a moment of remembering. What is the power of REMEMBERING your purpose? How do we make it widely known?

Here are some questions to help you reflect on this subject.

Q. Does everybody have a purpose?

Q. Why haven’t we as a society made remembering our purpose of common practice?

Q. How do you remember why you were here and what you were supposed to do?

Q. What can we do to teach younger generations so that they know this?

Q. What blocks people from understanding or remembering their true purpose?

Q. What tools will help them overcome the blocks?

– Wendy